How to Save Baseball: Less is More

Last week, the Tampa Bay Rays were on the cusp of clinching a post-season berth for the second time in three years.  The Rays are an excellent young team, built by Gerry Hunsicker, the brains behind the 2005 National League Champion, Houston Astros.  God, do I miss having competence at the helm of the Astros franchise (Drayton McClane, not included).  For those who do not know, Hunsicker was the Astros' General Manager from 1995-2004 .  Go ahead, count their post-season appearances during that span.  You will need two hands.  What's more, Tampa does not seem to care about the Rays.  I've got my theories as to why and we'll explore them after the break...

The Rays are a young, exciting team.  But, one that is drawing 17,000 fans per game while they are neck and neck with the Yankees for a Division Title which they eventually secured on the final weekend of the season.  This is a team that earned a trip to the World Series two years ago.  This is also a team whose owner is diligently looking to relocate them.  Obviously, they are not profitable in Tampa/St. Petersburg.  What causes a team that is very competitive to have shots like this one make the local paper in September?  It should be noted that the Rays were giving away tickets to games for their final home-stand and that is an absolute disgrace:

Do you think the Tampa Bay Buccaneers would be required to give away tickets to games if they were in the race for a division title and/or playoff berth?  How about an emphatic no.  Look, I realize we are in recessionary times.  People are holding on a little tighter to their cash.  The scarcity of football also makes it more appealing to attend in person.  It's simply not a nightly affair (it only seems like it is ladies).  Ratings for baseball are down, interest is down, and the overall appeal of the sport is down as the details of the steroid era continue surfacing.  Which brings me to this...

• Quick Sidebar Rant:  Hey Congress, why do you freaking care if Roger Clemens lied to you about taking steroids?  Stop wasting time and money on this colossally irrelevant investigation.  Perhaps you could focus on more important things, like um, auditing the FED (never been done), balancing the budget, passing legitimate health care reform without pork for your districts, etc?  Oh, and try not to vote yourselves a raise this year since you are so in touch with mainstream America (riiiiight).  Below, you will find a lovely picture of our Speaker of the House.  There, I feel better.      

 

I digress, for baseball to survive in our increasingly impatient society, a couple of things need to happen.  First, it needs to quit competing with football.  MLB saves its best for last, which is in direct competition with college football, pro football, and for the die-hards, high school football, right when the season is in full swing.  I can tell you right now, I'd rather take in the Katy Tigers on a given Friday night than watch the Reds vs. Phillies should they be airing as direct competition.  This would call for the season ending the first week of September. 

Secondly, they must expand the number of teams in the post season while shortening the number of regular season games.  Of the major sports, baseball has the fewest percentage of its teams qualify for post-season play.  Let's face it, how many of us have found ourselves right where this guy is?  This must have been right around game #157 of the season:

 

Summarily, the season is simply too long and fan interest is waning.  I wonder if cheerleaders would help?  They certainly might have assisted in keeping the Propecia candidate above alert and ready for those blistering foul balls, which have adults clamoring over them as if they are worth about $1000 a piece.  However it needs to be done, interest needs to be increased somehow, someway.  Aside from scantily clad sideline supporters, whose participation is prohibited by the aforementioned screaming foul balls which are constructed of gold, perhaps we could make sure the season ends in September?  You know, before actual cheerleaders, bands, tailgating, and other divine ingredients are positioned to refute baseball interest permanently.