Three Men and a Baby (of a Congress)

Three men are sitting in a bar.  Two are going to trial next year for lying under oath, allegedly.  The other is the modern day hero of the Democratic Party.  We all know William Jefferson Clinton lied about his involvement with a young White House intern, Monica Lewinsky.  However, what we do not know is why did Clinton receive a pass on his alleged perjury, yet the witch hunt is raging against Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds?  Let's look at the facts, shall we?

All three men lied for one main reason:  pride.  All were embarrassed over the miscalculations and errors of their ways.  Another way to say it:  all were embarrassed that they were caught.  Additionally, all felt they were shamefully singled out for their transgressions as "many men before them" had fallen in similar fashion.  Certainly Clinton was not the first president of the United States to have an affair and try to hide it.  Simple affair math tells us that multiple presidents of this nation have taken this path without regard for the fallout.  Similarly, Bonds and Clemens were not the first athletes to look for an edge over their competition, be it illegal or simply against the rules.  But, why did Congress become involved with Major League Baseball's steroid era?  Doesn't Congress have better things to do?  You know, more important matters to address?  Oh, who am I kidding.  This is the US Congress we are talking about.  We will get to their waste in mere moments.

Why did Congress become involved you ask?  In a nutshell, Major League Baseball has been exempt from most federal anti-trust laws laws since 1922, when the Supreme Court ruled in its favor in Federal Baseball Club of Baltimore, Inc. v. National Baseball Clubs. The exemption prevents teams from suing if they are not granted the right to change locations at will. While its exemption from anti-trust laws has nothing to do with steroid use by players, it does place the affairs of Major League Baseball squarely under the jurisdiction of Congress (USgovinfo).  Did you catch that?  Translation:  Because they can, not because they should.  Your tax dollars at work ladies and gentlemen.  What.  A.  Waste.

Feel better?  Of course you don't.  The leaders of this nation fail miserably on a daily basis spending time on crap like this.  I got into a mini debate on Twitter with Richard Justice of the Houston Chronicle today on this very topic.  My point of view is simple:  if Clemens and Bonds are found guilty, I hope Obama pardons them immediately as this has been a colossal waste of time and resources.  Justice chimed back with "Perjury...No big deal?...Wow."  His stance is they lied to Congress therefore, they should pay.  The bigger problem?  The simple fact that politicians (actual definition warning)---->a person primarily interested in political office for selfish or other narrow usually short-sighted reasons<----lie on a regular basis during campaign speeches.  Yet, these are the people we are reliant upon to "get to the bottom" of the steroid problems that plague baseball?  Just because they can intervene does not mean they should.  Like most things the government gets involved with, waste ensues.  Look, I do not condone lying under oath.  My major issue is one of why on earth are we here in the first place?  How did we get so off course with what our government is focusing on?  We all know we deserve better, but I digress.  Here are some snippets regarding government waste:

• A total of $3 million has been granted to researchers at the University of California at Irvine so that they can play video games such as World of Warcraft.
• Approximately $1 million of U.S. taxpayer money was used to create poetry for the Little Rock, New Orleans, Milwaukee and Chicago zoos.  The goal of the "poetry" is to help raise awareness on environmental issues.
• $615,000 was given to the University of California at Santa Cruz to digitize photos, T-shirts and concert tickets belonging to the Grateful Dead

If you would really like to reach for the duct tape to keep your head from exploding off of your shoulders, Just. Click. Here.

Hey geniuses, how about focusing on some things that are actually relevant to the betterment of this nation such as getting us out of Iraq, repealing this crammed down health care bill, balancing the budget, halting earmarks, and not voting yourselves a raise this year.  Is this too much to ask?  Of course it is.  We really do not care if Clemens, Bonds, and Clinton lied about petty nonsense such as steroids and sexual escapades with interns.  In the grand scheme of things, we don't need you to fight these fights.  What we need are real leaders to address and correct real problems.  This nation needs all of its resources to go to very relevant matters and not trivial ones.  It's time to grow up and stop acting like babies.